Relaxation

This last weekend was again a little deviation from the normal rowdiness of the class. We discussed relaxation. I was thinking about the spectrum and how we move from active to not so active. I by nature am an active person and I do not slow down very easily. I know others that relax very easily. Finding a balance between these two is like most things hard to do.

It is well documented the benefits of deep relaxation. This is to be distinguished between rest or sleep. During deep relaxation you make a conscious effort to relax muscles, breathing, slow heart rate, raise extremity temperature. There are mechanisms out there that you can attach to yourself to give you feedback so you know if you are successful such as temperature sensors, heart rate monitors, EMG (to measure muscle activity)

We did not have fancy equipment but played a sound track of ocean waves. This rhythmic and calming to many people but any sound can be used. We all lay flat on our backs and placed our hands on our stomachs and started to breath deeply using the diaphragm. This means expanding your lungs with the diaphragm and your stomach will rise and fall not your shoulders.

Next we moved to contracting our feet which in turns contracts many of the muscles of the leg. We counted down and then released the muscles and with some imagery let the legs fall heavy onto the floor not to be picked up again. We visualized the blood vessels getting larger and blood flowing to the toes. We then did the same with the arms by clinching the fists.

We moved to the heart and allowed it to sound very loud and slowing down and with each beat a wave of relaxation go over the body. There are great benefits to allowing blood vessels to relax and letting the tissues of the body receive blood and oxygenate all tissue around it.

The head is one of the hardest but most important to relax. The forehead and jaw are key to getting relaxed. It's not often that people like to let their jaw down and mouth open but this is were the focus comes in. After getting fully relaxed we kept this position for 10 minutes. For some of the group this was too long for the position they were in and it caused some low back pain. This was okay as we discussed finding a good spot to be in so pain does not interrupt your concentration.

All in all this was a good class to take a step back and shut the world outside and focus on 30 minutes of full relaxation. This leaves the body rejuvenated and ready to return the stresses that beat it down. Remember that relaxation is a conscious effort and we can learn to stay relaxed even in times of stress.

My challenge is to take time each week to deeply relax. It does not take more than 10 minutes. The better you are the faster you can get into a state of deep relaxation. Try it out!

You! Magnificent. Amazing, You!

This post was sent to me by Sue, a regular participant of the class. I pass it on to everyone else that visits here.

John

You! Magnificent, Amazing, You

When you look at that title, I wonder, what your thoughts are. Care to share? I know for many of my younger years I felt anything but magnificent, or amazing… words like that just DID not fit what I was taught, by my Mom anyway.

My Dad on the other hand always believed in me. He was my cheerleader, the one person I could almost always count on to soothe my ruffled feathers… except of course when he was scolding me for something or another. Usually it was for getting into the Ho-Ho's, or the Twinkies that my mom had stashed away for his lunch. (Yes indeed, I come by my sweet tooth honestly!!) Even though I knew he believed in me, it really bothered me that my Mom didn’t. Her favorite word you see was stupid. Oh how I learned to dislike that word… It always has a tendency to make me cringe, still to this day.

A couple of weeks ago, I was talking with my therapist about my fear of letting go of certain things, many of which are papers that I’ve saved over the years for one reason or another. There are certain things, no matter how hard I’d tried, I found VERY difficult to dispose of. During the course of our conversation she picked up a statement I’d made regarding getting rid of these things… I may need to prove someday… x, y, z.

When she brought this to my attention how often I’d said that in this, and previous sessions, she asked why I felt that need to prove something… I fumbled for a minute, and then it hit me…. Old childhood scars that I thought were long since healed still haunted me. Holding onto things, was a way to prove I wasn’t stupid, that I’d made the right decisions, etc. to whomever.

A pile of papers that I’d been holding onto for years, left my house last Sunday. It wasn’t easy, and I’m still struggling with whether or not I did the right thing, but the funny thing is since then, I’ve felt a bit more motivated to make a bigger impact. And I aim to!!

Thinking about this, I think about the messages we may have heard as children, and not really thought much of, but if leave them be, we will never truly see the possibilities, the choices, or the strengths we have within ourselves, and give them free rein.

I’ve recognized over the last several years that one of my strengths is in writing. The other day I was told, “I’m waiting for your book to come out.” I was humbled, inspired, and awed all at the same time.

There are things we each enjoy doing. If you were to look at those things, (legal things of course) could you see them as one or more of your strengths? If someone encouraged you to pursue those things, what might your life be like? What hidden miracles are within you waiting to be discovered?

One thing I’ve learned is that if I don’t believe in myself, in my abilities, my strengths, etc., how can I expect others to? There can be miracles when you believe.

Take a moment to look within, and try to discover what those abilities and strengths you have. What would it take for you to believe you can achieve your hearts desire? Perhaps, like me it starts with believing in you?

If you’re able, listen to the song “When You Believe” by Celtic Woman as you take that look within. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4-rBF1UM3o

Body Language

This weeks class was a little different than in the past. There was no "exercise" portion like usual. I found it difficult to bring that into what I was trying to get across and there was so much information that it was hard to fit it all in.

I listened to a study once about a group that read a newspaper comic with a pencil placed in their mouth. There were two groups, one with the pencil between the lips and the other with the pencil between their teeth. The difference between these two ways are that one produces a frown and the other produces a smile. The group with a smile or pencil between the teeth rated the comic as funnier.

This is significant because the smile or body position actually triggered an emotion and not the emotion trigger the body position. Many times I think the thought is we show our emotions through our body language and not the other way around. There is a saying that goes "fake 'til you make it". Maybe you can put yourself in a position or do the body language to feel the emotion you would like to feel. If I am sad I smile to feel better. If I am scared I change my body to feel more confidence.

I came across a website that has many charts on what things could mean with a certain body part. You have to realize that these are general observations and not absolutes. The website is:

http://www.businessballs.com/body-language.htm

We divided up the body and several emotions and drew out of an envelop one of each of us put ourselves in the way that body part would demonstrate that emotion. It was fun and interesting to see how each participant would demonstrate the emotion. Everyone had a variation and it was sort of each's fingerprint.

The challenge of this class was to explore and be aware of your body language and how you are feeling with the different positions you find yourself in. If you find that you are trying to overcome an emotion take the stance of the emotion you would like to feel. There is real power in this connection. Good luck. Until next time.